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It is important that you do what is right for you, that you choose to do the things in this life which suit you as a person. There is no point in doing what you do not like, or do not believe in, in order to please another person. If you do, then you will usually end up resenting the person whom you had chosen to try to please.
We humans do what we want in this life (generally speaking) but we do not always admit to ourselves that this is the case. It is easy to say that it is another person's fault that something happened, and so on, and yet in reality the truth is that we chose to go along with whatever it was. There are many situations which I think the majority of people will relate to as ones in which we knew didn't quite feel right and yet we never the less went along with it.
It is easy in hindsight to see that the wrong choice was made, and possibly that choice was made based upon the wrong reasons. How many people know of someone who stays with their partner because they are afraid of being on their own? Or perhaps you know someone who leaves a good and stable, loving and successful relationship because "something" (which they cannot quite identify) is missing?
In the world of business, how many people go into a job because it is expected of them as opposed to what they are really passionate about? It is so easy for human beings to be swayed by what other people think, or by the local "norms" in our community, or by what we think that others expect of us. It is also easy to be swayed in our very beliefs about what is right or wrong, and perhaps it is also easy to alter our own beliefs in the hope that we will change the beliefs of others.
When the chips are down, the most important thing is to be true to your own path in this life, and this means not being swayed too much by others and also not swaying others to go along with you. We are all on our own paths, and we all have to take our individual course through this life. Your own beliefs should change only because you are discovering more and more accurately who you are as a person and not because you are purely aligning with the beliefs of friends or associates, or because you are trying to impose your beliefs on another.
This does not mean that you should not change. To not change would be to stagnate and die. This is a world which constantly moves and changes and everything within it moves and changes too. Human beings are no exception. The important thing is to have the confidence to move and change in a manner appropriate to you, in a way which suits you and affirms your true beliefs about yourself.
Nor does it mean that you should not compromise in certain circumstances or situations. Compromise is inevitable in a world where everyone is an individual living their own life, upon their own path. The key is in having the ability to compromise without compromising your own beliefs or those of the other person; Balance has to be sought. There has to be give and take in every relationship in life. Life is like a see-saw; as one end goes up there is another end which goes down...but there is an optimal point where both ends are level and everyone is happy. This is the equilibrium which everyone should seek to achieve in their relationships with others.
This equilibrium can only happen if you have self-confidence. To have the confidence to be yourself and to continually grow in your understanding of yourself and the world is the basis of what life is all about. |
